Getting Diagnosed with ADHD and Anxiety as an Adult Woman: Mental Health Matters

A Brief Note

I started writing this article with the intention of posting it sometime in May. I feel like it’s appropriate to the topic that I’m posting it in June. That’s all!

Table of Contents

1. A Brief Note
2. Table of Contents
3. The Article
4. The State of My Brain in May of 2021
5. ADHD and Anxiety
6. Post-Diagnosis
7. SIGN UP FOR MY MONTHLY NEWSLETTER
8. CHECK OUT MY RECENT POSTS

The Article

With May comes a lot of cool things like leaves on trees, high pollen counts, and a day dedicated to tacos and margaritas. It might seem like there’s nothing quite as cool as sipping margs with itchy, watery eyes, pretending it’s patio weather in Minnesota, but there is. May heard people saying it couldn’t get any cooler and said “hold my beer.” May went out dedicated its whole self to Mental Health Awareness.

May is doing the most. 

Until about 2 weeks ago, I actually wasn’t aware that May is Mental Health Awareness Month. I saw it on social media and thought to myself huh, that’s ironic. 

Mental health is talked about often on social media, but not so much in real life, it seems. I see posts and stories talking about the importance of taking care of your mind, and oftentimes I’m nodding along or liking and sharing the content. My family and I learned the importance of being open about mental health in May of 2021, which is where my story starts.

After two years of struggling with a host of symptoms from general distraction to anxious thoughts, I sought out professional help in the summer of 2021. In December, I received my official diagnosis: ADHD and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD).

The State of My Brain in May of 2021

Whenever I’ve been in an icebreaker situation where there’s a question about superpowers, I’m always surprised by how many people say they’d want to have mind reading abilities. 

My first thought is always along the lines of this: did this many people really miss out on Twilight? Edward Cullen never looked like he was having a good time. Plus, social media is kind of like that anyways, and does anyone actually enjoy knowing what everybody is thinking? 

Then, I think about how a friendship would never last between me and a mind-reader. Most days my brain is distracted, stressed, and severely off-topic. It’s a weird and funny place, but slightly chaotic. No matter how much he liked my blood, if Edward Cullen had access to this space, he’d be out.  

Here is a brief glimpse into the state of my brain in May of 2021: 

This doesn’t scratch the surface, but it gives a pretty good image of the cycle of thoughts and experiences I had every day. For 25 years of my life, I thought everybody experienced the same thing. It’s common to experience anxiety, distraction, inattentiveness, impulsivity etc., but I started to suspect in May of 2021 that I was experiencing these traits at a slightly higher range and frequency than “normal.” 

ADHD and Anxiety

Girls with ADHD often go through childhood and early adulthood undiagnosed. According to CHADD, boys are diagnosed with ADHD at twice the rate of girls in childhood. In adulthood, ADHD is almost equally prevalent in both women and men. Read: girls struggle with ADHD too, but it is often not until they are adults and advocate for themselves that they receive a diagnosis. 

It is also common for women with ADHD to have Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). Anxiety is actually the reason I first sought out a diagnosis. I was experiencing panic attacks at ridiculous rates and was getting sick of feeling like I was having a heart attack every few weeks. Going into a diagnosis, I had no idea the two conditions could feed into each other. 

When talking with my doctor, she explained that oftentimes women with ADHD also have anxiety. The key to finding a treatment that works is determining which of the two is causing the most problems, or which is taking up the most mind realty. 

The symptoms caused by ADHD can be caused by many other conditions, including anxiety. To get diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, the patient has to have experienced ADHD symptoms starting before the age of 12. If the ADHD-like symptoms started after the age of 12, it could be another condition causing the symptoms. 

Given that anxiety was a relatively recent problem, I spent time reflecting on my childhood before my diagnosis appointment. Honestly, I don’t know how I went so long without a diagnosis given the evidence. But ADHD presents differently in girls than it does in boys, which is why it so often goes undiagnosed. For me, it looked like daydreaming, excessive talking, and a pretty disastrous bedroom (ask my sister). 

Post-Diagnosis

An official diagnosis felt validating. Whenever I walk into an appointment I always stop and think to myself: wait, am I making this up? The diagnosis helped confirm that my experience was real, and to some degree negatively affecting my life. 

The answers I finally received prompted a strange cycle of emotions. After the initial period of relief, I had a slight 24 hour identity crisis. I’ve defined myself for 26 years by many traits that I just learned were a direct result of my ADHD. I found my mind wandering to important questions that demanded answers like “am I actually funny?” and “could I have been on-time to all those places?”

To help answer them, I ordered a workbook for women recently diagnosed with ADHD. I forgot I’d ordered it and was surprised when it arrived at my house 3 days later, but I sat down immediately and worked through the first two chapters. It had me reflect on life and settled my wild emotions, helping me land on one single post-diagnosis emotion: grateful.

Though I never finished the workbook, I eventually worked with my doctor to try out medication. Since beginning medication in February, there have been major and noticeable shifts in my life including increased focus and productivity, decreased anxiety, and just generally a better life balance. 

That is….when I remember to take my meds. 

This is all to say, MENTAL HEALTH IS HEALTH. If you’re not feeling 100, talk to someone. If you’re experiencing any symptoms that aren’t the norm, talk to someone. If you want a second opinion from another doctor, get one. It’s so important. It can be un-comfy talking about these things at first, but it’s worth it in the long run. Look out for more posts with stories and resources about mental health.

CHECK OUT MY RECENT POSTS

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• Getting Diagnosed with ADHD and Anxiety as an Adult Woman: Mental Health Matters
• REVIEW: The Layover by Lacie Waldon
• March Mini Reviews: Olga Dies Dreaming and The Golden Couple
• February Mini Reviews: The Vanishing Half, Reckless Girls, A Slow Fire Burning